Using Your Head

Retired Australian Football Star Wayne Carey has made champagne headlines this week. The Athlete reportedly was seen smashing himself in the head with a full champagne bottle while staying at the W Hotel in New York City. According to the eye witness account, Mr. Carey broke the bottle by "smashing it across his own head" leaving the former footballer with a small gash and in a semi-conscious state. Although footballers' heads are notoriously strong, this Pirate prefers sabrage for opening champagne. When performed properly, sabrage leaves no lines on your head, little champagne is lost, and consciousness is maintained at least until after the champagne is consumed.